Piersimoni charged with lying and

cheating under oath on steroid use

Times Staff Writers

Silver Lake – Anna Marie Piersimoni has admitted to charges of steroid use amid wide speculation that her power-hitting, cancer-blasting, spouse-whipping scrabble match was artificially boosted by one of the infamous steroid medications distributed to mitigate side effects of chemotherapy. After taking husband Larry Brooks by a whopping 3 points in a tightly contested, low-scoring, highly medicated game, AMP tested positive for steroids. She emphatically denied cheating or use of any other "performance enhancing substances" beyond the typical steroid dexamethasone, mangosteen juice, gardenia aromatherapy oil and some medical marijuana. This was Piersimoni's first chemotherapy treatment and first use of these steroids "What accounts for all those pre-cancer scrabble wins at the beach when we were just dating ? Or in those long sitter-less Friday nights during the early child-rearing years of our marriage? How come I won all those then, huh?" No further details were provided, but that revelation figures to complicate AMP's efforts to negotiate a free-agent contract for next season.